Easter reflections

Easter is a big church weekend...probably, the biggest of the year. It usually makes me tired. It is complete with Good Friday service and communion, Sunrise service, Easter Brunch and Easter worship, at Grace Fellowship. This year we had only one combined worship service (other than Sunrise service) and rented the high school fine arts building because our facilities are already too small. This added the load of setting up and taking down--all of that in the middle of a day-long rainstorm.

With all of the extended work and preparation, it is easy to go through the accelerated activity of this significant weekend for every believer--and miss the whole point!

I didn't do that this year.

From Friday morning as Beverly and I had our morning devotions I sought to focus on Jesus' death and commented on it throughout the day in every contact I had. By the time Good Frfday service rolled around, I was primed for worship and communion and left exhilarated.

Saturday was a day of preparing my mind for Sunday's services. I prayed we wouldn't have rain--God had other designs--and looked forward to the unparalleled privilege of declaring the good news of the gospel on Resurrection Sunday.

We awakened to torrential rains Sunday morning (I was up at 4:00 a.m.) and a meager crowd for our indoors sunrise service (I don't think I saw the sun all morning).

I arrived at the worship site early--someone had an emergency trip to the hospital from the setup crew--so I arrived to fill in. Unfortunately, 150 chairs were missing and we scrambled to find additional seating to accommodate the crowd we expected. I confess to a few moments of frustration and despair that the devil seemed intent on ruining a potentially wonderful day.

It poured rain all morning but all the volunteer cooks showed up with their egg quiches and fruit bowls and pastries intact, and everyone else showed up with their appetites and Easter Sunday smiles. It made for a great time of fellowship.

When the service began, every seat was filled (thank God for the extra chairs we found) and the opening song resonated with excitement in the acoustically-live gymlike setting. A progam of wonderful music, drama and congregational singing was a fitting agenda for a worship experience focused on Christ's resurrection. I truly worshipped.

And then it was my turn to stand and proclaim the good news of the gospel from Romans 5:1-11 with special attention to the incredble truth--"God demonstrated His love for us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us!"-- and people responded that morning to the invitation to embrace that truth in repentance and new life!

It was truly a happy Easter on a big church weekend. But I will remember it with thanksgiving for its breathing new life into mine, at a time I needed to be spirituall refreshed.

san francisco

I just spent a day and two nights in San Francisco with my wife. While there we visited my son, Greg, who is working in the city and preparing to get ready for his pre-med training. It wa mostly cold and wet but a brief interlude of sunshine and spotty blue sky entertained us Monday afternoon.

And then we awakened to torrential rain...and returned home to the "safety" of Amador County, where it was raining, too.

Trips to San Francisco are good for me. I like San Francisco I like its cultural diversity, its congested downtown, its variety of eating fares, its street commerce, its night life and lights, its beautiful parks and neighboring ocean shorelines.

I like coming home to Amador County. I like its quietness, its meandering streams and velvety green hillsides, its antique towns and unplanned streets, its friendly people and slow pace.

Amador County is home.

San Francisco is the rest of the world.

The wisdom of elders

On Wednesday I met for prayer with 5-6 special people from our church family. Dick and Joyce were a part of that group and I realized how blessed I am to have them in our church family. In their seventies--but looking and acting much younger--they are a vital part of our ministry team at Grace and Dick is our oldest elder and I welcome his words of wisdom.

Yesterday I ate lunch with someone about twenty years older than me. Jim is a veteran Christian and and metal building contractor andI found myself hanging on his words of advice and counsel offered in the flow of a normal conversation. His gentle spirit was a comfort to me.

Today I purposely sat with our minister of senior citizens. He does much more than that but this is his primary area of service. He was a pastor for more than fifty years and I have the utmost respect and regard for him as a fellow pastor and a friend. Ward helps put things into perspective for me. His steadiness and grace are a remidner to me about how to appropriately respond to the challenges of ministry each day. He is a living example to me of what I desire my life to look like.

I was thinking that over the years God has led into my life men older than me--wise and mature veterans of the faith--who have supported me, prayed for me, and kept me going when I felt like quitting. Thank God for the wisdom of elders in my life.

"I AM THE BREAD OF LIFE"

Jesus' introduction of Himself as the "bread of life" in John 6:35 is significant to me. The promise that to partake of Him is to never hunger again is especially intriguing.

Barretts love to eat; in fact, we live to eat. Our conversations historically have been about the new restaurant most recently visited, the quantity (and occasionally, quality) of food served, etc.

In recent years that has changed for me due to health concerns and my determination to keep my weight under control. I relished the Adkins diet for over a year because it allowed me to do what most diets don't--eat! I think I have discovered that eating is my therapy for stress and boredom, and to some extent, it is how I subconsicously reward myself. Anyway, I am learning to "eat to live", not live to eat".

My eating is symptomatic, I know, of deeper concerns, and my quest to be satisfied. In earlier days my motivation to be happy and content was tied up with getting more stuff, having others' approval, and living from one fun-filled occasion to another, even though those events were infrequent. Subsequently, I suffered through periods of deep depression because I was ultimately not satisfied by any of these things.

I am learning that only Jesus satisfies the deepest longings of my heart. He is the "bread of life" and when I feed on Him--meditate on his Word, live to please Him, spend my life for others--I am content in the truest sense of the word.

My diet has changed as I have grown older and, hopefully wiser. I eat less and focus on other places of interest than the local restaurants.

And I allow myself to be satisfied daily by the "bread of life".

Will it ever stop raining?

Yes, I know we need the rain.

But when will it ever stop!?!

I suppose most of us have wrestled with this intrusion on spring. We are waiting for the arrival of the beautiful northern California sunshine, the advent of multi-colored wildflowers and the aroma of spring in the air.

On a personal level, I want the rain to stop so our contractor can begin his work on our turn lane, something required for occupancy of our new facilities.

I want the rain to stop so I can weed my garden and begin the therapy of working in my yard and enjoying the beauty of God's creative work coupled with my limited gardening skills.

I want the rain to stop so I can move from the treadmill in my cold garage to the outdoor walking and exercise that I welcome this time of the year.

I want the rain to stop because the sunshine has a positive effect on my "fragile" psyche. I just feel better and more alive when there is blue sky and an un-obscured sun.

Sound like a whiner, don't I.

What I do realize is that when life is raining downs its recurrent challnges--the "rain falls on the just and the unjust"--I am generally wishing it would stop. ..stop so I can get on with life as I imagine it.

But I realize that the rain is good for me. Trials and tests make me lean more upon God, stretch my faith to examine His divine resources and not to selfishly indulge my finite and small reserves.

So I guess I will quit whining and thank God for the rain. The hills are greener, the sun appears occasionally-enough to give me hope for spring--and the building moves ahead, on a timetable that God knows about.

Even as I am writing, the rain has stopped...for the moment.

TEARS

I have had several moments in the last few weeks where I was tearful...not a comfortable place for most men. I was thinking about some recent contexts in which I had felt such deep emotion that I could not hide my tears...

*the shared pain of someone I love

*the firsthand observation of unparalleled disaster

*the recognition of personal failure

*a sad movie chronicling life's heartache

*an experience of worship contemplating God's grace to me

As I recall the specific details of each of these experiences I remember the sense of cleansing and relief I felt when my tears were spent, even though I was embarassed at my public display of emotions.

I am learning as I get older that it is okay for me to cry. Even though I have secretly felt for me it was a sign of weakness--and obviously it cannot accompany the daily responsibilities of pastoral ministry (many of which make me want to cry)--I am becoming more comfortable with the idea of being authentic about my true feelings.

John 11:35 observes Jesus at Lazarus' house with the shortest verse of scripture, "Jesus wept". This reminds me that Jesus had a very human side to Him and when we are told by the writer of the book of Hebrews that He is "moved by our infirmities", I am encouraged that tears need not be shunned or stifled.

I shed some tears when I preached on Sunday. I was embarassed. But it was how I really felt about what I was sharing.

It is Wednesday...and I am okay about it.

Little is Much...

"Little is much when God is in it..." are the familiar words of a song I heard as a child growing up (yes, it is an old song) but its message resonates within my heart after a week spent in New Orleans.

Mike Stromberg, Terry Throssel, Bob Swett, Steve Thomas, Bob Temple and Dan Simpson joined me for seven days on a work trip to Desire Street, the location of Sean and Emily Rorden's storm-battered home. For the last seven months as Desire Sreet Academy has relocated in Florida and Emily has continued her studies in Baton Rouge, Sean and Emily have spent most of the time separated from each other--and they are still newlyweds!--and away from the home they had lived in for only two months when Hurricane Katrina struck with a vengeance. Rain, winds and a faucet turned on by an errant tile from neighbor's roof, innundated their home with water and the resultant damage made the house unliveable.

Armed with tools, our work team arrived on Sunday evening, settled in at a hostel in downtown New Orleans and prepared for the job of ordering materials, redoing drwyall, taping and texturing the walls, painting the entire house, repairing the roof, restoring electrical fixtures, replacing all the door mouldings, installing new doors, "replacing" the kitchen sink and appliances, repairing some sub-floor, and generally preparing the house for Sean and Emily's happy re-entry on Friday evening, where they spent the night awaiting the arrival of carpet and flooring over the weekend.

Sean and Emily live in the upper ninth ward, a poverty-stricken area of the city hit hard by the hurricance, though not as dramatically as the lower ninth ward. Desire Street Academy, where Sean works as a teacher and coach, was devastaed by the flood and is currently undergoing rennovation and repair by numerous workt eams who have come to render aid. The academy is a beacon light in an impoverished area offering school, church, a medical clinic, sports programming and a variety of other resources in the name of Jesus. CURE is a group of 15-16 local churches that have banded together to suppport and enable this ministry. Due to the hurricane's devastation--the lower ninth ward looks like a war zone--the ministry has relocated to Flordia where it is housing and educating 80-90 boys from the academy.

Though a new location is planned in Baton Rouge in 2006-2007, the prayer is that Desire Street Academy will once again shed its light in this community as the plans for New Orleans continue to be hammered out. Decisions about viability, insurance and liability will be carefully evaluated as a final decision is made.

Until then, we can be praying for the staff and teachers of Desire Street and for God's direction for the ministry ahead. We can pray, too, for renewed strength and a sharpened vision about how their incarnational ministry can continue in this area so desparate for God's presence and power.

Sean and Emily's small house is a lighthouse as well in an area of broken-down houses and broken-up families. The return to their home will allow children once again to knock at their door and to find the love and attention they crave, all given in the name of Jesus.

I am basically unskilled when it comes to building things. For a week, however, I did what I could with the "little" I had to offer, and watched it--with six of my brothers--turn into something much larger...into literally a potential ministry center. I can't be there physically--Sean and Emily can--but I, along with the gracious members of our church family and all of our work team--helped make that happen. It is a week I will never forget!

"Little is much when God is in it..."

NEW ORLEANS

On Sunday morning seven men--including me--leave for a work trip in New Orleans. Our church has a vested interest in a young lady from our congregation and her husband, Sean and Emily Rorden. Sean works at Desire Street Academy, a school for needy young men in New Orleans, now ravaged by the flood. The school has relocated for the time being in Florida, and Emily continues her training as a registered nurse in Baton Rouge.

Sean and Emily's house was also damaged by Hurricane Katrina and our crew is going in to make repairs to make the house once again livable. Needless to say, we are all excited about this trip and the opportunity to help a young couple in ministry whom we love very much.

The Grace of Giving

On Sunday I spoke on the subject of giving, using the passage from II Corinthians 8:1-9 as my reference.

So much of giving is construed as a money issue--yet it is much more than that. Verses 8 and 9 tells us that for our sakes Jesus, who was rich, became poor--the Incarnation reveals this--and because of that, we who are poor, are allowed to become rich in Christ through His provision on the cross. The enormity of Christ's self-emptying (see Philippians 2) in coming to earth as a man, and the volitional laying down of His life for us that we might live, is the basis of our understanding of grace.

Here's what I see in this passage that recites the experience of the Macedonians who gave sacrifically to the needs of others--that our experiences of grace in Christ are what motivate our expressions of grace to others. The Corinthians, who excel in other gifts, are exhorted by Paul to "excel in the grace of giving" as well.

The Macedonians begged for the "privilege" to give in spite of their own "severe trial" and gave with "overflowing joy", and their extreme povery welled up in rich generosity."

Jesus modeled this "grace of giving" on the cross, and the Macedonians imitated this mindset in their own giving. We, as the Corinthians are, are challenged to do the same.

As we shared Communion Sunday and reflected upon Christ's work, our congregation had an opportunity to consider the experience of grace we have in our relationship with Christ, and, then, to offer ourselves to God and to others in the expression of the grace of giving.

still a dad

When your children grow up and leave home, they don't...really.

I say that with a deep sense of satisfaction.

I have enjoyed having my son, Greg, live with us the last seven weeks. He is getting ready for another move in his life--this time to San Francisco. His transition included getting settled in an apartment and finding work--all goals that he accomplished. It was fun for me to help him move his things into an apartment in downtown San Francisco, huffing and puffing up the hills from the garage to his upstairs room. I simply felt proud to still be his dad!

I have really enjoyed having my daughter, Jennifer, and her two children--Milla and Owen--with us for about ten days. Jennifer lives in Texas so I don't get to see her very often but this has been a wonderful time of just "loving on" her and our incredible grandchildren! It is also a time that we have had to sit and talk and talk about the changes that are an inevitable part of all of our lives. I am glad, however, that some things remain constant. I am still her dad!

taps

I just had a funeral for a fellow I never knew.

It was wonderful to hear all the nice things said about him by his son, his nephew, distant cousins, fellow workers, neighbors and friends. Seldom have I heard such consistently kind words said about anyone.

Chuck served in the Air Force and so at the end of the service a military guard presented the flag to his wife while a distant bugler played "Taps".

"Taps" was a song played in the Civil War that signalled the end of the day. There is alot of debate about who wrote it--most assume a fellow named Butterfield--but no argument about its place as a haunting, yet comforting sound, at day's end.

As I listened to the twenty-four notes of "Taps", I thought about the end of my day--and the end of my days--and the kinds of things people might say about me.

I hope I fare as well as Chuck.

AIR TRAVEL

I really never get too excited about flying. I prefer it if Bev (my wife) goes with me, but this last week I traveled by myself to care for some family business.

What is worst about flying for me is the cramped space. 6'3" people were not consulted in the designing of an aircraft. I have discovered some favorite places to sit--near an exit is one (first class is another, but I can't afford that)--which allow me to stretch out my "old" knees.

On an airplane you are often seated in close proximity to someone else. Some are talkers; others are sleepers. Some are friendly; others are sullen and non-communicative. Some are small and others are not, and space can be a huge concern!

And then there is the issue of food. It is hard to be sustained by a small bag of peanuts and a soft drink ona three hour flight, but such is the meal plan for many airlines today...in order to cut the costs ( though it still seems pretty expensive to me, considering the "benefits").

Well, my last flight, I enjoyed an exit seat, sat by four people who talked to someone else most of the way, and had a free ticket, courtesy of a friend. The food was the usual...but I like peanuts, lucky for me.

So what does this have to do with anything?

I read a book on the way home that challenged me to examine my attitute as a leader. It suggested that how I processed things would influence people around me. It is easy for me to be anxious and negative about things I imagine, including air travel. It turns out that all those worries and concerns were misplaced.

As I sat with my staff this morning I did so with a positive attitutude, challenging them in the midst of a difficult time for our church and its building program. I thought alot about what I would say to them upon my return. I think we all felt better after our meeting.

Maybe I need to travel more often...?

chicken fried steak

Last night I did a "no no". I ate chicken fried steak.

It was really good. It was served at a local restuarant where atmosphere and ambiance are an afterthought but good, unhealthy comfort food is a high priority.

I ate with my son--we both ordered the same thing (he can afford to eat chicken fried steak; I can't!)--and I enjoyed every fattening cholestorol-laden bite of cream gravy, baked potato and corn that went along with it.

I reveled in the moments I completely ignored my diet, forgot about my diabetes, and "chowed down".

Today I feel somewhat differently about the experience. I am trying to process the residual guilt and work past the gnawing ache in my stomach from greasy food. I know better, but sometimes I just can't resist...chicken fried steak.

I was thinking about the other "achilles heel" areas of my life--areas that are troublesome, but for one reason or another, I reserve the right to indulge from time-to-time. They are--some of them--far more threatening and forboding to my spiritual health than chicken fried steak is to my physical well-being.

But once in awhile, when I am feeling careless and selfish, I will allow myself the momentary irresponsible pursuit and "enjoyment" of something that is not good for me--something that is potentially devasating to my spiritual well-being--and pay the price of guilt later. I always decide it wasn't worth it!

"Lord, when tempted to indulge my cravings for the things that are not good for me--the things that separate me from you--help me to learn to say 'no' because I realize the momentary "comfort" does not compare to the inevitable ache in my stomach."

Chicken fried steak...I can't afford the luxury!

It went well...

The church business meeting is history...and it went well.

Thank you, Lord.

CHURCH BUSINESS

"Church business"??? Those two words linked together can conjure up all kinds of mental images, undoubtedly impacted by past experiences or even secondhand information from someone else.

I am guessing no one perks up with excitement when the topic is introduced. There is probably a collective sigh signalling discomfort or an arched eyebrow of apprehension.

Even at Grace, the church I pastor, we all have our memories and reservations. There have been occasions where an open forum provided an unwelcomed opportunity for a staff member's reimbursement package to be ridiculed based on perceived productivity. We have grimaced as volunteer bookkpeepers were literally "raked over the coals" for incorrect entries. Many have come to approach these meetings with a sense of dread because there always seems to be an accentuation of the negative and the promotion of personal agenda concerns, overshadowing the attempts at open disclosure, congregational participation, and happy anticipation of a new year of increased ministry opportunity.

It has taken a long time--at least, much longer than we expected--to get our new facilities completed. As we near the exciting conclusion of the task we can't help but wonder about the few who suspect alterior motives, profligate spending and other assorted innuendos of incompetency. Will we speak the truth in love?

Church business meetings should be characterized by Christian principles of conduct--believing the best, in honor preferring another, edifying the body, applauding accountability, determining to walk in faith and responsible stewardship of resources, etc. At Grace we have no reason to suspect or expect anything less.

Church business is not a necessary evil. It is an incredible opportunity to demonstrate Christian principles at work, even when people have a different point of view and disagree. It should be a model for others to see of Christian brothers and sisters agreeing together to put the needs of the body above personal preferences.

We get to see how well that works on Sunday. Let's be praying together as we look back at a year of blessing and forward to a year of opportunity.

The building

We are now in our eighteenth month of construction of our 26,000 square foot facilities. It seems much longer than that, and 2-3 months of coordinated construction remain. It will be a race to Easter Sunday...on a wounded horse, I suspect.

Sometimes I avoid talking about...the building.

But as we round the final turn I am thinking about all of the lessons I have learned in route to the finish line.

1. God and I have much different time tables.

2. I am constantly surprised about God meets specific needs.

3. There are some wonderful people who have gone beyond the "call of duty" in making the building happen. They are the real heroes, and, often, unseen.

4. Adversity creates unity; at least for those who are making the daily decisions we have learned the value of working together.

5. I have had to defer to others, to much wiser men than me, in some key decisions--a gratifying experience.

There are other lessons I could mention--and more to learn, I am confident. The building has been a building experience for me personally. I can almost think of it and smile.

The building...

who's in control?

Our neighbors to the north in the fair state of Oregon have the backing of the United States Supreme Court, in its 6-3 decision to allow the distribution of "drugs to produce death", arguing that the "federal drug law did not give the Justice department the authority to regulate the practice of medicine". In 2001 Attorney General John Ashcroft has authorized the prosecution of doctors under the federal Controlled Substance Act because assisted suicide is not a "legitimate medical purp0se for drugs controlled under the law".

Judge Scalia wrote in the minority dissenting opinion, "If the term 'legitimate medical purpose' has any meaning, it surely excludes the prescription of drugs to produce death"...hardly a novel idea. Jay Sekulow. chief counsel of the American Center for Law and Justice, added, "This is a disturbing and dangerous decision that can only lessen the value of protecting human life."

Of course the applause is heard from those who insist that the denial of this "privilege" violates state and individual rights, and that its acceptance allows for dignity, compassion and love in the death scene. Charlene Andrews a terminal cancer victim, says that she takes comfort in knowing that she will control when the end comes.

We like being in control--even if it means the murder of a baby in its mother's womb through abortion to insure a mother does not lose control of her life (not withstanding the fact that the mother may have been deliberately out of control when she had unprotected sex and conceived), or, in this case, orchestrating our own death scene when the "all-knowing" doctors have determined we have six motnhs or less to live. Interestingly enough, a woman from our church family was sent home to die and receive hospice care several months ago, but hospice has now left the scene because it appears she has longer than the medically-prescribed and hospice-mandated six months to live... Who is in control here?

We don't get it. We are not in control or we could have sex and say "No baby will come from this union; I am in control"; then abortion would be an unnecessary option. Abortion suggests we weren't in control at the appropriate time (The obvious control option is abstinence but that isn't an acceptable option...is it? That would require some control).

We are just as lost at the other end of the life continuum. We want to be in control of what our death scene looks like. Never mind that our obesity, drug and alcohol usage, and obsession with stuff may drive us "uncontrollably" to an untimely demise. When we get to the end of the road we simply want to say, "Turn up the music, sit me in a chair where I can hear the ocean...and give me some drugs so I can die with dignity."

We are out of control.

trailer camping

A recent acquisition for my wife and me was a small 18' travel trailer. We have now used it a total of two (2) times and have decided this is a way of life we can embrace with enthusiasm. Now the question is can we settle for a travel trailer when a motor home is so much nicer...and more expensive...?

What is so wonderful about trailer camping anyway? I thought you would never ask!

1. We can do it together (my wife and I treasure our infrequent time alone).

2. We can get away from the frantic pace of life (I needed a break).

3. We can see the ocean (we were just at Pismo Beach) and take long walks on its shoreline.

4. We can share this experince with friends (we just camped with three other couples).

5. We can feel close to nature and close to God (...and we did!)

We are back after five glorious days of sand and sun, and relaxation.

And that's why I like trailer camping!

Happy new year...?

The wish for a "happy new year" seems trite, and unrealistic, doesn't it? Happiness seems such a mercurial thing--here one day, and gone tomorrow.

As I reflect upon the past year, it was not "happy". I mean, it had its moments--two new grandchildren, camping in our trailer, nights at the movies with Bev, Mexican Train with our friends, working in the yard, trips to see our kids and grandkids, etc.

But it had its no so "happy" moments--the challenge of a difficult church building program, the loss of some special friends, the painful illnesses of loved ones, the breakup of some marriages, "getting-older" problems, etc.

So the wish for a "happy new year", though well-intentioned--must be tempered with realism. I am convinced that God never promised us this kind of happiness. What God did promise us is found in these words from Romans 14:17, "For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit..."

May God grant you a joyful new year!

the most wonderful time of the year

The song says "It's the most wonderful time of the year..." referring to the Christmas season. I concur!

Here's why...

1. The true focus is Christ's coming to earth to bring salvation. What could be more meaningful than that?

2. The special music of the season echoes forth sentiments of hope and family. I can embrace these afresh.

3. The seasonal beauty of Christmas lights and decorations against a dark night's backdrop is stunning. I love just looking.

4. The unparalleled love of family is distinctively heart-warming. I can't wait for our special holiday gatherings.

5. Theincredible privilege of giving helps me to see the needs of those much less fortunate than I. What could be more rewarding than sharing with someone else?

It is the most wonderful time of the year!

the marketplace

A young man told me today of his work-related stress.

It was not so much the job, but environmental. He has a Christian family-- small children and a wonderful wife--and loves his church family.

But every week he drives a significant distance to work to an environment where he feels like a stranger, an alien.

He would really like to find a job where he was in full-time vocational Christian service. He has a heart for serving people, and loves being around his Christian brothers.

But the marketplace is hard. It takes discipline to stay focused on God. It is challenging to look for opportunities to share his faith. And there are days when he goes home and says, "I dropped the ball today...I missed an opportunity".

From the safe confines of my pastoral office--insulated from the rest of the world--I reminded him that his sphere of influence IS his ministry and his children ARE his first priority. A positrion of vocational Christian service may await him, but until then, he is where God has placed him, and that, with purpose.

The marketplace comes to me. I generally am in my office studying or counseling, visiting at a hospital or in a home, ministering at the church. At that level I feel I have it easier than most. There are only isolated circumstances in which i feel I am a stranger, an alien.

So the real issue in focus here for my young friend is the old "in" the world but not "of" the world enigma and how that translates into his daily life.

My prayer is that he will make the marketplace a ministry center, a place where his life touched and changed by the grace of God, indelibly impacts the lives of those around him.

And, that when he goes home to his family, he will see his ministry to them as a spiritual leader, a high calling.

He may not be able to totally escape the enironmental stress, but, hopefully, his sense of divine placement and purpose will ennoble his day.

LIVING WATER

The Samaritan woman who met Jesus at the well was there for water--to quench her thirst, assist in her family cooking, wash the clothes-- perform the daily functions accompanied by water.

She probably wasn't expecting an offer of "living water" when she met Jesus that day.

She expected to come back--day after day--to replenish her supply, with the knowledge that such water would never truly satisfy her deepest, innermost needs.

Needs that five husbands and now, a "boy friend" had never managed to meet as well.

But Jesus made her an offer she couldn't refuse--he told her if she drank His water she would never thirst again.

I am not sure she truly understood the significance of that offer but she said, "Give me some of that to drink!"

Jesus would tell her that He was exactly whom she was looking for--"I am He!"--and she would tell others of her discovery (see John 4).

Try the "living water". It satisfies the deepest needs of your heart.

CHRISTMAS MUSIC

I have had very little success trying to find traditional Christmas carols on the radio. I was excited about the prospect of attending a special musical function as a large church which does a Christmas "spectacular" each year. At last, Christmas carols...

Alas...no Christmas carols! Lots of good contemporary Christmas songs--which I enjoyed, too--but none of the traditional Christmas music I wait each year to hear.

I have been digging out my old Christmas cd's and playing them over and over again. As I write, the strains of "O Little Town of Bethlehem" serenade me from a cd entitled "Peaceful Christmas".

I love all of the Christmas music, but am lobbying for hearing the traditional Christmas carols!

A traditional "Merry Christmas!" to you...

The plight of "Tookie" Williams

The real tragedy for "Tookie" is that his death really resolves nothing.

One of the relatives of his murdered victims has said, "It will bring closure to it.."

The protesting placard reads, "Practice what U preach...Thou shalt not kill".

"Tookie" was found guilty of four murders during his time as a member of the Cripps' gang that he formed, a gang known for its violence and brutality. In his later years of incarceration he co-wrote several children's books against gangs, and sought to spread his anti-gang message.

Governor Schwarzenegger noted in his denial of clemency, "Williams protests that he had no reason to apologize for these murders because he did not commit them...without an apology for these senseless and brutal killings there can be no redemption."

What, then, are we left with?

the loss of four innocent lives

the suffering and anger of the victims' families

the death of a murderer

the justice of our criminal system

Is anything learned? Is anything if value salvaged by an act of capital punishment?

I will let others debate the issue although I believe that capital punishment is NOT the State's decision, but a decision by the criminal to "do his thing" and "take his chances", whatever the motivating circumstances.

The court has said he is guilty. The law insists he must die.

And so he did.

Ken Riffe

Ken was my father's friend. My dad would be 83 years old if he were still alive (he died seventeen years ago) and Ken was 86. He died Monday.

Ken was one of the kindest men I have known. He was a man whoa lways smiled, and never complained. He was the janitor at the church and school, and more recently, my brother's "right arm" man is doing the mundane chores that are part of maintaining a church facility.

Ken found out he had terminal cancer about a month ago. He ended up having surgery and being bed-ridden because of the cancer lodging in his spine. He was in alot of pain in his final days.

I got to see him a few days before Thanksgiving. I realized how valuable people like Ken are to a pastor. They are the supportive ones behind the scenes who do the "little things" that make our job easier. Ken was that to both my dad and now my brother.

Ken was my friend, too, and I what I will remember was our embrace before I left him and his smile as we left the room. I will miss him.

old cars

We have a 1995 Volkswagon Jetta that is a car my wife desired for a long time. It belonged to her son and she always told him, "When you get ready to get rid of it, I want it."" That exciting date arrived several months ago.

Now Chad reminded us it was an older car even though he took great care of it (and warned us that we probably didn't want to buy it). It looks "brand new", BUT it has had a series of repairs and necessary improvements since we got it.

New tires, New belts, New hoses, New radio,

New mats, New door trim

The latest news is that something is wrong with the axle and so it is at the mechanic's once again.

We have been asking the question, "How much more do we want to put into it?" but we always remember we don't have a car payment and once this is done, there isn't that much left that can go wrong...We hope.

I was thinking that when God got ahold me I was pretty run down and "messed up" even though I probably looked deceptively "okay" on the outside. I am certain that God has wondered aloud sometime since He purchased me, "How much more do I want to invest in him?" I don't want to seem silly or frivilous, but it is pretty amazing that God is still committed to me.

I think I will keep the Jetta. As the owner I remain committed to its upkeep and maintenance. It will probably need brakes and something else down the road but I am in for the long run...

So is God's committment to me.

I HAVE RETURNED

I suppose there is always a moment when I am with my children and grandchildren that I think, "I do NOT want to go back to the real world...it's more fun here with them!" It is inwardly "tearful" for me when I say "good-bye" because I am never certain how long it will be before we get to see each other again.

It was fun to listen to six year old JJ read second grade books, and to wrestle with Milla while she giggled uncontrollably. And it was wonderful to hold none month-old Owen for the second time and to see those big eyes acknowledge me as another admirer...and to hope they won't grow up too much more before my next vsiit.

I loved being with my children--Jeff, Jen and Greg--and Jeanette and TJ, who I love like my own kids. They pampered me and spoiled me for four days...and I felt proud, because when I look at them, I see something good...something good in spite of me.

But I have returned...to a full desk, a busy church, and, most of all, to the woman I love. I miss my Texas family already, but I have returned to the place I belong.

Dallas

I lived in Dallas for fourteen years and when I moved to California to assume a new pastoral position, I left three of my four children there. One now has moved to Nashville, Tennessee and the other three remain in the dallas area...along with three grandchildren.

I love to go back to Dallas. It isn't the weather, nor is the beauty of Texas that beckons me.

Jeff, Jeanette, JJ, Tj, Jennifer, Milla and Owen are the main attractions.

I will only be there for four days, and those four days will be jammed-packed with family gatherings (my favorite), one-on-one time with the grandchildren, and a time to catch up with my children who I adore...and miss terribly. Of course, I will miss Andrea, who lives ten hours further east.

I get to see my Dallas family about twice a year. It is not near enough for me and so I always go with mixed emotions. It will be wonderful to be there--JJ will treat me as if am the best thing since Spiderman, and Milla will "wow" me with her new vocabulary (I've heard "smidgetts" of her conversations via telephone). And Owen, now nine months old, will get acquainted with me for the second time since he was born. That should be an adventure!

It is painful to leave. Usually, it takes me a few hours on the plane ride home to transition to the idea of being separated for another six months. But I manage--I have to--and look forward to the next encounter, offset by phone calls, e-mails, pictures and occasonal pieces of "art" that help to shorten the distance between visits.

I look forward to my Dallas visits.

I will tell you more after my return December 5th. Hope you had a happy thanksgiving!

THANKSGIVING...do I need a holiday to remember?

I guess the question I have been mulling over in my mind the last few weeks as we head into the Thanksgiving regimen--special church service, "thanks" notes to my special friends and family, preparation for THE day and THE meal...etc, is...

Do I need a holiday to remember to be thankful?

Well, the honest answer is I do need occasional prodding. I am haunted by the story of the lepers (Luke 17) who are miraculously healed by Jesus and only one--ONLY ONE--returns to thank Jesus. His response? "Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Was no one found to return to give praise to God except for this foreigner (he was a Samaritan)?"

What really gets me is the only thankful one was the one you would have least expected to give thanks to God--a Samaritan, hated by the Jews. He was estranged from his Jewish neighbors, excluded because of his heritage as well as his disease. Still, he finds his way back to Jesus to give thanks, while the nine others--perhaps feeling"entitled" to healing because of their ancestry--forget to do so.

I hope I don't feel entitled, or, expect that I should be well-fed, have a nice home, drive a car, have televisions and computers in my home, own more than five pair of shoes, etc., because I am American, or, because I try to live a good moral life.

I have what I have because God has been good to me. Not because of who I am or what I have done. If that were the case, I'd still be a leper.

That's why I was thankful two weeks ago...long before the holiday season reminded me to have a grateful heart.

HOPE

*Multiple myeloma, five kids under the age of twelve

*Liver cancer, three small boys

*Life-threatening hematoma, senior citizen

*Widowed lady, no children or family

*Crumbling business, broken marriage

*Alcoholism, fractured family

*Infidelity, divorce, grief

Is there any hope? And, if there is...how is it communicated? How is it translated into its life-transforming potential?

In each of these situations in which I am involved at some level I am overwhelmed at the crisis of need. I feel painfully inadequate to address these incredibly challenging circumstances. I have wept myself at the level of pain encountered in each. And I have wondered in my position as a pastor what I can "bring to the table" that will offer hope.

I stand firmly-grounded in my faith, with these truths in tact.

1. God is not surprised by these crises for He knows all things, even the final outcome, Revelation 21:6.

2. There is nothing new about these circumstances and God provides "a way of escape to bear it", I Corinthians 10:13.

3. God's grace is sufficient for each situation and each person involved, II Corinthians 12:9.

4. The final outcome is uncertain, but God's purposes will be accomplished, Romans 8:28.

5. Therefore, I can rest in Him, Matthew 11:28.

I am not suggesting that we merely recite these truths and assume that we have installed some magical formula that will bring an end to our doubts and fears; rather, I am acknowledging

that pain is a part of the human circumstance--some of it even self-inflicted--but that the message of hope is available to everyone of us in Christ, who offers us His love, His strength, His grace, His time, and His rest.

That's my reason for hope.

Veteran's Day..and Thanksgiving

On Sunday, November 20th we will have a late celebration of Veteran's Day, an intetional oversight. We are combining it with a special Thanksgiving service.

Our focus will be on Mike oram and Steve Hauser, two young men from our church family, who returned safely froma tour of duty in Iraq. We sent them off with our prayerful blessing, wrote to them while they were overseas and, now, we are celebrating their return to us.

We can do that without politicizing an unpopular war. Personally, I am grieved by the 2,000 plus men and women who have lost their lives there. I am saddened at the slow pace of political reform and anxious for the escalating costs of "running a war".

On the other hand, I am grateful that we still have young men and women who consider it a privilege to "fight" for their country and who place their lives at great personal risk in the line of battle. Historically, this has achieved for us a country with unparalleled freedoms and blessings enjoyed nowhere else in the world.

On the Sunday before Thanksgiving it will be a joy to honor these two soldiers--and to remember the countless others in our congregations and others--who served their country well.

For me, Veteran's Day and Thanksgiving go together.

DRESSING UP

I am leaving for a retreat this weekend and was going through my closet trying to determine what I should pack. I am going to be at Lake Tahoe...it's going to be cold...and we are in an informal environment...but I have to speak...and Bev hates that shirt...?

I guess I do spend time thinking about what kind of appearance I make, whether it's preparing for the office, preaching on Sunday...and, yes, even packing for a retreat!

I just got this picture from my daughter of my grandchildren on Halloween eve all dressed up to go "trick or treating". I thought to myself, "They are so cute, even if they didn't have a costume people would want to give them candy."

I think when I am "dressing up" I am concerned about how I will be perceived, and wondering whether I will be accepted, whatever the occasion may be.

For me, that stems from an age-old presumption that I am not good enough just the way I am. And so, much of my life I have have had to fight the temptation to create an image that I think will be more acceptable, than if it were just the real me.

Anyway, I settled on some jeans and sweat shirts and a favorite sweater...that Bev doesn't like.

RESTORATION

I met with someone this week who has been isolated from the church for a period of time. His feelings were deeply wounded and the path to restoration has been a difficult one. He had withdrawn from his place of ministry at Grace.

He cited several things that had helped him--things that had recently been written to him framed with love and compassion, the overt expressions of unconditional love from his peers, and some things in his own life he was dealing with.

His question to me was "Is there still a place for me?"

Oh, the beauty of restoration!

And, yes...there is a place.

Proposition 73

I am saddened this morning to note that Propostion 73--a directive to demand parents be notfied of a teenager's decision to have an abortion-- was defeated in California.

At a recent local Pregnancy Center banquet we were reminded that abortion is murder, and that our ignorance of the issue, "What is the unborn?", has resulted in the ruthless slaughter of thousands of innocent children within the womb of their mothers.

Our confusion about the value of life has resulted in a movement at the other end of the life continuum to heightened discussions about euthanasia, assisted suicide--when we deem life to be painful to be endured or too burdensome to be maintained.

Proposition 73 simply said that an adolescent girl should speak to her parents before she seeks an abortion and secure their consent. Not a big deal when she needs their consent to get an aspirin at school...

a three-stranded cord

Ecclesiastes 4:12 simply says, "A strand of three cords is not easily broken..."

As I head for Couples' retreat at Zephyr Cove in Lake Tahoe later this week, I think of the significance of that truth in my marriage to Beverly. we are held together by our love and commitment one to another. but the key ingredient is our mutual love for God and our recognition that we are complete in Him (Colossians 2:9,10).

It is easy to seek to find our completeness in anothe r person and often we find an enormous amount of satisfaction in that special relationship. But such relationships are subject to the attrition of human behavior, the unwelcome entrance of crisis and tragedy, the failure to keep our promises.

And we discover that we are not enough for each other...alone.

When Christ enters the picture, and we are truly married to Him, we find a copmpletion and satisfaction that cannot be rivaled...and cannot be broken.

I can't wait to get to Couples Retreat and spend some quality time with my wife. But we both know what is the proverbial glue that holds us together.

young families

I have the privilge of watching young families grow in the Lord. Nothing is more encouraging to me in ministry than observing that firsthand.

I have a standing appointment with a young man who meets with me each. Sometimes his wife and family accompany him to our time together, always a rich experience for me. We share together, dream together, pray together. And I am always the richer for it.

Young men like this man give me hope for God's church tomorrow. I see a a young man committed to God, passionate about using his gifts and successfully and faithfully leading his family to God.

I see a young woman, aspiring to honor God and her husband, caring for her children--seeking God's will for the ministry of their family in the body of Christ. Is it any wonder that I am excited?

Young families...they are foundational for the future of the church when people old like me have passed on.

I am encouraged today!

timing

God's calendar is different than ours. God's reckoning of time is different than ours.

I have been "wrestling" with that reality in recent days.

*Why is it taking so long to complete our building? Every week we are faced with a new challenge that delays construction, invites more cost, and pushes the date back for occupation.

*Why does cancer come to a young life and decimate it, with little children potentially left motherless? It is hideous even with older people, but when it is someone young, it is even more confounding.

*How long must someone suffer--an alcoholic son, a potentially devastating financial crisis, a recurring need for chemotherapy?

I have no answers that are satisfactory in the sense that they bring resolution and and intellectual satisfaction. Even as I write those words--"intellectual satisfaction"--they seem arrogant and faithless.

So what do I do? I turn to the Word of God.

"Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen".

Amen.

PASTOR CHURCH

Pastor Henry Church was my predecessor in Northern California at a small church in Amador County. He was loved by everyone in the community and was the prototype country preacher. He knew everyone, visited everyone, loved everyone.

He loved horses and the outdoors. Amador County afforded him the luxury of a rural setting but his heart always longed for his native Arkansas. In the final years of his life he moved there...until a horseback-riding accident nearly killed him. He ended up in Arizona, and just a week before he died, back home in Amador County.

I was honored to have a part in his memorial service. His son, Henry, Jr., a missionary in Africa, shared a reflective eulogy about his father and punctuated all the things we knew about him as friends and parishioners, as a son. What we saw in public, he was at home.

We will miss Henry.

PUBLIC OFFICIALS

President Bush's recent nominee for the Supreme Court withdrew her name this week, much to the apparent delight of both liberal and conservative political pundits.

I was reflecting upon the process since and thinking about the intense scrutiny candidates are subjected to--and, perhaps, rightly so. The office of supreme court justice is a high and lofty one and we are entitled to know what a potential justice may be thinking about key issues. I guess.

It just seems as if no one can survive such intense examination, doesn't it? They are labeled and pronounced "guilty" of whatever seems contradictory to the subjective opinions of those who feel it is their duty to make such judgments.

But, then, we are all public people to varying degrees. We have our spheres of influence--some greater than others--and people are watching us and making their own judgments about us.

Jesus said that "all men will know that you are my disciples if you love one another", John 13:35. By this very statement He assures us people will be watching us and our conduct in terms of our interpersonal relationships will have much to say about the legtimacy of our faith and service to God.

We may not be public officials but as believers we are public witnesses to our faith in Christ. People will make their own pronouncements about us, but if they are going to discern the valdity of our relationship to God it will be because of how we treat one another within the body of Christ.

Valerie

Our daughter-in-law, Julie, recently shared with us the news of her sister's liver cancer. Valerie is only thirty-seven years old and has three children, ages 1,4 and 6. Her husband, Chris, has physical problems as well so this is a real crisis time for this young family. I would like to ask all of my church family and blog readers to join in prayer for Valerie who is undergoing tests at UCLA Medical Center, awaiting a final diagnosis and treatment plan.

So many issues are stirred when we think about all the factors here that make us want to ask "why?" Our true comfort and strength come from the knowledge that God is sovereign--He is not surprised by what is happening in the McCrea household. The passage of comfort and direction for me during these days as we think of Valerie, are the words of the Psalmist who writes,

"His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse,

nor His delight in the legs of a man;

the Lord delights in those who fear Him,

who put their hope in His unfailing love."

turn lane plans take a turn

If you have followed my blog site you read recently of the huge relief at the securing of our turn lane permit for our new facilites.

Yesterday we received word that the approval had been rescinded. GROAN.

However, the reason for the change is that we are going to be required to do LESS work and to SAVE money on the anticipated $250,000 project. PRAISE THE LORD! (I think...)

I am still working through this development in my mind because of all the time factors and the re-education of our congregation regarding this miexed blessing.

The bottom line for me today is acknowledging that this is God's thing--not mine--and I must trust Him

PRAISE THE LORD! (I am sure!)

JJ

JJ (my grandson) called me a few weeks ago to tell me about the three goals he scored in a soccer game. He left the message and then I had to call him back and get his version of the story, followed by his father's (my son) colorful adaptation of what really happened.

I was sooooo proud. That athletic ability comes through the genes, grandfather-father-son. It was amazing to picture JJ running down the field full speed and defytly weaving his way through defenders to score. I mean, I could remember the days when Jeff, his father, made six interceptions in one football game. Like I said, it runs in the family!

Seriously, I hope I can pass something else on to my children and grandchildren. We can argue about the athletic skills and wonder about grandpa's vivid imagination and inflated evaluation of his own skills. But what a grandfather really wants to see in his progeny is a strong faith in God, a character molded by God's Word.

I can't pass that through the genes. But I can try--however imperfectly--to be an example...to Jeff and to JJ.

home

we have been gone for over a week on a much-needed vacation break. we rested and hiked and rested and biked and rested...and so we are rested!

we were in some beautiful country and enjoyed the beauty of God's creative work.

we were with some wonderful people and exulted in the fellowship of family and friends. i even held my newest grandson, haaken, which was a special treat (not to mention playing with sage, eden and zeke).

but...we are home... and there is nothing like being home, i have decided.

yes, it is back to the rigors of work.

yes, it is eyeing all the household tasks to be addressed.

yes, it was 27 phone messages and 542 e-mails.

yes, it was sorting through piles of mail and magazines and old newspapers (i should have cancelled for the week!)

yes, it was the news of two friends who had died, a funeral to prepare, a list of those in serious need.

yes! yes! yes! yes! yes!

yes...it is my life--my wonderful life--a life to which God has called me.

i am glad to be home!

PTL FOR A TURN LANE!

The good news today is that we have final approval for a turn lane from Cal Trans. Praise the Lord (PTL)!

This has been a process of unparalleled frustration. the process looks something like this.

1. We want a turn lane.

2. We don't want a turn lane.

3. A turn lane could cost $750,000.

3. You need a turn lane.

4. You don't need a turn lane.

5. You need a turn lane.

6. A turn lane will cost $250,000.

7. The Bank of Stockton will lend us the money.

8. Let's build a turn lane.

9. Here are the plans from the engineer for the turn lane.

10. Here are the revised plans back from Cal Trans for the turn lane (repeat #9 and #10 five times)

11. Today...the turn lane plans and drawing are approved.

12. We will have a turn lane when our contractor can work us, probably work to begin in six weeks.

Turns out we won't need the turn lane for another 3-4 months so the timing is fine. We have prayed for this issue for over three years so today is a day of praising the Lord at Grace Fellowship Church!

AT REST

restless spirit

frantically flailing in my soul

subdued without notice

traumatized muscles

awkwardly arching against my skin

relaxed without effort

fractured emotions

silently screaming beneath the surface

quiet without reason

mindless thoughts

ruthlessly running over my solitude

exit withour fanfare

i am at rest

TREADMILL

I passed my treadmill test on Monday. It was interesting how I discovered I had passed. After about 12 minutes on the treadmill at ever escalating speeds and angles, I was told, "You have answered all the questions we have; would you like to stop now?"

The doctor, my personal friend, then proceeded to tell me all the things a treadmill may not show, i.e. other sources of heart trauma, hidden blockages, etc. I was feeling very tense and afraid as he rehearsed all of the other possible scenarios and concluding inwardly, "I must have failed the test..."

When he was all done, I asked, "Well, did I pass the test?"

"Oh, did I forget to tell you? Yes, your treadmill was normal; you passed the test!"

When we come before God each day, He isn't there to discuss all the possible results of our sinful makeup and human nature, frigthtening as those are. Instead, He is there to say, "you passed the test...you have trusted in my Son."

That's the good news of the gospel. Stay on the treadmill, if you must, but I choose to get off and simply embrace the fact that in Christ I have passed the test!

I feel pretty good about my treadmill results. It is good to know my heart is in good shape.

Is yours?

milla

I am sure you agree with me that Milla--full name, Camilla--is beautiful! She is identical in her appearance to her mother, my oldest daughter, Jennifer. When I saw this picture it was as if I had been taken back in time thirty years ago to when Jennifer was just a little girl (I am in trouble...I revealed her age). It is almost as if I am looking at a facsimile of the same person!

In my Christian life my desire is to be like Jesus--so that when others look at me, they will see Christ. That is a lofty ambition--one I have certainly not achieved-- but it is a compelling motivation to resemble my heavenly Father, and in so doing, attract others to Him.

When I see Milla, there are a myriad of happy memories she incites of times spent with Jennifer when she was a little girl.

Is there anything about what God is making me through his mercy and grace that would draw others to Christ? Is there any resemblance to my heavenly Father? It is my prayer.

Grandpa Again

Ten grandchildren makes one proud!

Haaken Case Theule was born on September 8th to Tim and Susie Theule, their fourth child. Beverly, my wife, was able to be with them when the baby was born. It was an exicitng time since the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck and he had to be rushed to ICU...but he is home and doing fine!

We are rejoicing in the miracle of life. Though I was not present at the scene, I never cease to be amazed at the gift of life, and as Beverly detailed it for me, I could sense the awe and wonder at God's creative power.

We have ten of those precious "grandbaby gifts"--Sage, Eden, Ezekiel and Haaken Theule; Kyle, Julianne and Nathaniel Theule; JJ Barrett, and Camilla and Owen Vlach. I thought they needed some blogsite notoriety!

It is fun to be grandpa again!

Filling in...

My regular secretary is gone today. Pity her substitute. She has to read my handwriting!

Every Monday I generally make a list of some of the missing families and we send bulletins to those who were gone. This can generally be as many as 100 families and my scribbled list has to be discerned by some poor soul.

Mr regular secretary has learned to decipher my scrawl. For that she is grossly underpaid. The volunteer substitutes are doubly-penalized--we don't pay them...and they have to read my handwriting. I always shudder when I think of the subsitute's task--and even though I try harder to be legible--it is oftena futile exercise.

I was thinking about the Hebrews' passage that tells us Jesus is our faithful High Priest. In that position He is never absent, but always present. There is no subsititute standing in His place while He is on sabbatical. He is always there. He already knows my heart, knows my life...he knows how to read me.

It is a good thing no one is filling in when I come to Christ with a plate full of failures and blunders. He knows me, and remarkably, still loves me.

So do my secretaries...I think.

ATT: Blogsite readers

Let me know if you are reading this blogsite. Dale

the building

Please join us for prayer as we construct our building at Grace Fellowship Church.

FRUSTRATION

Ever wanted to do something, you couldn't find a way to do...even though you knew it needed to be done?

I guess that best describes my condition today. I really want to do something for the hurricane victims, but I can't figure out how to do it. As I watched the people milling about in the Astrodome, I thought, "I could go and be a counselor...offer encouragement, share the Word of God". I saw several men walking around with the words VOLUNTEER MINISTER on the back of their clothing, and I thought, "That could be me!"

That's where I am today; in fact, it's where I have been for the last week as I watch the grueling tale of a city under water unfold, and listen to the platiff cries for help.

I am frustrated. I can't go now because I am needed here. I have responsibilities, ministry to faithfully perform to the people I have been called to serve.

I will go, I hope, soon enough to offer some fleshed-out love and service in the next few months (work team planned!). In the meantime, I will do what God has called me to do...here.

And I can pray...HERE...NOW.

a work trip

Stay tuned for an update on our plans to send a work team to the New Orleans area when the dust clears and the water recedes....about twelve volunteered to join me on a work team projected for the Thanksgiving holidays. Of course, everything we plan will be dictated by the conditions and ability to get into the area at that time.

Our goal at Grace Fellowship is to designate our charitable gifts at this time for a very specific project. We are in communication with Desire Street Ministries to determine what is the best direction for our funding at this time. For more information, visit "Desire Street Ministries" on line and look for "Hurricane Update".

September 11th will be our first love offering for the victims of Hurricance Katrina. Gifts can also be mailed to Grace Fellowship Church, Box 850, Jackson, California 95642 and marked "disaster relief".

RESOLVED...

My wife and I have been deeply-moved by the continuing saga of the New Orleans tragedy. We have friends there and a ministry we support so our hearts have been touched in multiple ways.

Tragedies like this can be forgotten easily because (a) we are geographically distant and (b) we have tendency simply to emotionally detach in time and to "move on".

Bev and I have resolved two things.

1. We will not exchange Christmas presents this year (except gfifts for the grandchildren). We realize we have everything we need--and then some. Instead, we are going to earmark what we would have spent for gifts for Desire Street Ministries.

2. I am going to try to orchestrate a work team response of men to go to New Orleans at the "right time" (Thanksgiving week is my goal) to assist Desire Street Ministries in a meaningful project that will help restore their outreach in the city.

If you're interested in going with me, contact me at the church office (209-223-1971) or right here on my blog site.

Let's resolve to do something together.

STUFF

Someone told me today that they were considering some changes. The context for those, he expressed, was a brush with mortality that got him thinking.

What he is contemplating doing is getting rid of alot of his "stuff", downsizing to something much smaller, freeing himself from debt...so he can do the really important things in life.

I am there, too. I am a little younger, but daily reminders of the shortness of life cause me to ask, "What really matters?" It is a discipline for me because I find it easy to get caught up in "stuff".

I know better. People like the fellow I spoke to this morning are helpful reminders.

Desire Street Ministry

Tucked into the Ninth Quarter of New Orleans is an inner city outreach ministry called Desire Street. A school and a chuch reach out to needy teens in the area providing them with hope for a future beyond the streets of poverty and despair.

Sean and Emily and Aaron and Kristen are two special young couples who have joined the ministry team at Desire Street, teaching and working at the school and opening their homes--located in the heart of the inner city--to needy teenagers and their families.


These are top-quality young people who could work anywhere else; in fact, Emily is a student at LSU studying for her nursing degree and Aaron teaches art at Tulane Unviersity, in addition to his work at Desire Street. Sean coaches and teachers and Kristen is a part of the administrative team at the school.

Here's the tragedy. Along with thousands of others, Sean and Emily and Aaron and Kristen have houses under water in New Orleans, thanks to Hurricane Katrina. Desire Street Ministries is flooded as well, and the prospect for any of these buildings--and thousands of others--being suitable again for living or business looks decidedly bleak.

When you pray tonight, give thanks to God for the safety of the roof over your head and dry ground to walk on.

And pray for Sean and Emily, Aaron and Kristen, Desire Street Ministries...and thousands of others impacted by the devastation of Hurricane Katrina.

a wedding and a funeral

A wedding and a funeral today...

How are they different?
1. One is a time of happiness, the other one of sadness.

2. One is a time for celebrating, another is a time for grieving.

3. One is a time of anticipation, the other a time of closure.


How are they the same?
1. They both bring people together.

2. They both provide opportunity to ask for God's help.

3. The both inaugurate new life.

That last one may catch your breath. We understand that a wedding ushers in new life for a husband and a wife as they begin their journey together. That's a given.

But a funeral? A funeral may be perceived as an ending. But it is truly a beginning, for the believer who has the hope of eternal life. "For God so loved the world that he gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life" (John 3:16).

I hope you have trusted Christ for salvation and have begun your new life together--a life that is forever.

THE DOG DAYS OF SUMMER

Professional baseball managers talk about the dreaded "dog days of summer". They are the days during the season when they carry a limited 24 man roster and they must exhaust their player resources during the long and hot summer months...when the baseball season is in full "swing", and players are getting tired.

After September 1st, I believe, managers are given the option of an expanded roster by calling up players from the minor leagues to share the playing time, relieve the veterans, and diminish some of the pressure. Everyone looks forward to this time in the season!

The "dog days of summer" would appear to be an oxymoron. Summer? Time for vacation, increased family outings, relaxation and change of pace. Right?

Wrong. Many of you would silently admit you are glad the "dog days of summer" are about over. Kids back in school, weather cooling down, ready to step back into the regular routine.

It has been a long summer for me. The construction of our new facilities has been a monumental challenge. The daily life issues I confront as a pastor have been of dramatic intensity the last three months. There seems to have been little break from the hot blast of "summer sun".

I look forward to the fall. I love the changing colors, the cool breeze, the transition back to a more regular schedule. I know, too, the Lord willing, our church facilities will be completed in the next several months...and we really need them to do our growing ministry at Grace.

I was thinking, though...in May, I couldn't wait for summer!

lunches

I like lunch for all the obvious reasons. Here's a few of them.

1. I don't eat breakfast...usually.

2. By noon, I need a break from the sedentary position at my desk.

3. There is no food on site. I have checked.

4. My secretary reminds me it is lunch time.

5. My wife will ask me when I get home if I ate lunch.

6. By 2 or 3 in the afternoon my stomach will remind me.

7. I get to eat with a friend.

I have several standing appointments--actually "sitting" is more appropriate for what we do--for lunch. All morning today I looked forward to lunch with my friend.

I was not disappointed. He chose the place, he paid the bill (it was his turn), and I came back to the office...filled up with Chinese food and reminded of the value of lunch with a friend.

A TRIBUTE TO RUTH MELTZER

Ruth and Vern would have celebrated their sixty-fifth wedding anniversary tomorrow. He has been with the Lord for several years now, so she decided to join him today about 4:30 p.m. What a celebration!

Ruth was the quiet and supportive wife of Vern, a wonderful singer and vital part of Grace Fellowship Church. He was a member of the Board of Elders and a stabilizing element as we watched our church grow.

She was the one with the beautiful smile, the sophisticated grace, and loving devotion to her husband. When he passed away, a huge part of her died. She tried to live alone--it was difficult--and ultimately moved to a retirement center near her son and grandchildren.

Recently, she had been very ill, but surprised everyone with her physical resiliency. She had pneumonia and in her weakened respiratory condition, couldn't fight any longer.

She went home...to a joyous reunion with her Lord and Savior. I am confident Vern was there to greet her! Happy anniversary.

criticism

None of us like criticism. I am no exception. I was criticized yesterday.

I have tried over the years to ask myself a few questions when I hear personal criticism.

1. Who is criticising me? Is this person generally critical? Do they really know me? Would I value their opinion if it were positive?

2. Have I heard this criticism before from others? If there is a pattern of repetition regarding the criticism I am hearing maybe I need to take a closer look at myself.

3. Was the tone of the criticism reflective of a desire to help, shape, mold, and not just an opportunity for venting anger and hostility? If I suspect the motive is good, I handle criticism better, even if I don't agree with it.

I am reminded of this helpful scripture passage. "Each one should test his own actions..." Galatrians 6:4a . If we do that against the standard of God's Word and our understanding of His expectation of us, we have set a high standard for ourselves, one we cannot meet without His enabling grace.

We will not live life free from criticism, nor can we please everyone. We must seek to please God. "Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful...it is the Lord who judges me..." II Corinthians 4:2-4.

blood drawn

I had blood drawn today. My longsuffering doctor, a personal friend and a member of my church (who is probably thoroughly frustrated with me), ordered these tests a mere four months ago.

What prompted these tests was an incident four months ago that reoccurred four weeks ago. Nothing serious, I am sure, but it certainly got my attention.

I have asked myself why I am so wary of blood tests? I have deduced the following.

1. I may find out something I don't want to know.

2. It may require lifestyle changes.

3. I may have to take medication (something I hate) because of family medical history and natural propensities (I have been avoiding that).

The bottom line is logic that sounds like this: if I don't have the tests, I won't know the truth about my physical condition and, therefore, I can pretend everything is okay.

Yes, I know that is foolish.

So, I got my blood drawn today.

Facing the truth about ourselves is a difficult process. Avoiding it does not make the truth any less certain. Furthermore, it prolongs the inevitable moment of confrontation, and then, perhaps, at a time when it may be too late.

Is it time to take a closer look at the words of the hymnwriter who gives us hope for our condition, whatever it may prove to be?

"There is a fountain filled with blood

Drawn from Imannuel's veins.

And sinners plunged beneath that stream

Lose all their guilty stains."

parenting

Part 2 of my series on the family concerns the Ephesians 6:1-4 passage and its companion passage in Colossians 3:20,21. The question that has gripped me is "How do we as parents "provoke", "exasperate", "discourage" our children?

It isn't that the idea is novel to me, or that I am so arrogant as to presume this does not include me. It just really gets my attention, especially the Colossians 3:21 verse that suggests we can cause them "to lose heart".

How do you see your behavior in how you treat your children affecting them, especially on an emotional level? Would you share some examples with me, even if they confirm the fact you aren't a perfect parent?

brokenness

Sometimes we have to be broken before we are useful to God.

1. The alabaster vessel had to be broken before its fragrance could be shared, see Matthew 26:7.

2. Jesus said that if a corn of wheat did not first fall into the ground and die, it could not produce, see John 12:24. We know that the seed must first break up before it can initiate further growth.

A man shared with me how God literally has broken him up through recent tragedy and pressure in his life, but acknowledged at the same time, how God was molding and shaping his life, and (from my point of view) making him even more productive than he was.

Have you been broken? It is painful. I know firsthand.

Jesus' death was the epitomized expression of one literally being broken--wounded for our transgressions, brusied for our iniquities--and bringing hope and new life to those of us who walk in the shadow of His cross.

May others see us as broken vessels, being made fit for the Master's use.

TRYING TO FIX A PROBLEM...that another person doesn't think needs fixing

I am a "fixer" by nature. It is frustrating when I see a problem I can't fix.

The older I get, and the longer I serve as a counselor, the more I realize I really can't fix anything. Sometimes God may use me as a tool to do the repair work that is His to begin with.

A real obstacle to fixing something is agreeing that it needs to be fixed. I was recently in a meeting where someone whose need seemed apparent to everyone else, had no perception that he had a need at all. In fact, he was indignant at the idea.

So, there are a few "fix it" lessons for the day!

1. It's hard to "fix" someome when they don't think they need "fixing".

2. Even if they acknolwedge they need a "fix", we are not the "fixers". Only God can bring the needed mending.

3. Therefore, my job, when dealing with broken people, is to direct them to their only true source of help, Jesus Christ, the Great Physician (the Great "Fixer")!

HUSBANDS AND WIVES

It was my first message of a three part series on the family today. I have spent much of the last two weeks preparing for the day, with my wife's question from a week ago resonating in my mind, "Are you going to say anything new?"

The answer is "no". For awhile it was, "I'll try", though muffled within me.

My studies took me down several paths including reading statistical data from George Barna about the deteriorating family, reading a colleciton of magazine articles about the family in crisis, and reviewing several recent books on the family, including John MacArthur's, The Fulfilled Family. There was also the review of every New Testament passage that referred to the family as well as a search through the Proverbs for "tidbits" of truth regarding the family. A study of the early chapters of Genesis reminded me that marriage was God's idea to begin with.

Where I ended up "camping" was in Ephesians 5:22-33, a pretty standard reference for talking about the relationship between husbands and wives, and how they are to mirror Christ's relationship to His church. Nothing revolutionary. Nothing clever. Nothing new.

But something true...God's unassailable truth for twenty-first century believers trying to figure out to make marriage work.

Husbands and wives are potentially a picture of Christ's love relationship with believers. His love is characterized in these verses as having the components of sacrificial giving and unconditional care. Such love inspires us to submit to His headship and to repsect His leadership and ministry to us, His church.

Husbands and wives, two thousand years later, are called to the same standard of love for one another.

It's not new, but it works.

The world is watching.

blogging

It has been a difficult week to blog...too much mental clutter to clearly think about something worth writing.

staff meeting...board meeting...membership classes...sermon preparation...hospital visitation....late night counseling...administration work....afternoon counseling...crisis intervention...wedding planning...telephone responses...staff retreat preparation...building concerns....conflict resolution...disgruntled member...worship arrangements...thrift store management...jail release...care group...mentoring...family abuse concerns...senior citizen illnesses...etc.

Oh, yes, and somewhere in between...prayer and personal Bible study...and time with my wife...I think.

I am not whining or complaining. Maybe your week looks alot the same. The agenda items are just different.

So as I blog tonight, I am reminded that my relationship with God--its cultivation and enjoyment--are my first priority. And my time with my wife and family is next. Blogging can wait...and it did.

Just cleaning up the clutter...

finding a church home

My stepson and his family have just moved from Carlsbad to San Ramon due to a job transfer. They loved their church family there and now are faced with the task of finding a new church where they can worship and serve the Lord together.

How do you select a new church home? What are some of the most important factors for consideration?

Tell me, as a pastor, what you are looking for when you go searching for a church?

I will be anxious to read your responses.

THIS IS WHY

I am certain every minister has had those moments--mostly on Monday mornings--where he has asked himself, "Why am I doing this?" That question could be the response to poor attendance, a bad offering, an unkind editorial remark about his preaching, a complaint about his ministry in general...

When you have a congregation of 500-600 people, each with their own unique personalities, differing opinions, and distinctive theological ideas, it is almost arrogant to assume that everyone will be supportive, agreeable, and enthusiastically devoted to helping you build the church!

And, then, there's the "me" factor. I am well aware of my shortcomings--and there are those who have made it their job to remind me--and I know that I could very easily alienate someone without trying, offend someone with what I say, and generally be unappealing to someone who has a whole other idea of what a minister and ministry ought to look like.

I am learning this.

Every once in awhile, something happens that helps mute the disappointment of unmet expectations. Someone comes into my office and says...

"I just gave my life to the Lord about seven months ago.

I want to be baptized.

I can't wait to come to Sunday School and church to hear the Word of God.

I am trying to teach my children what I am learning and how to apply the things we learn each Sunday to our everyday life.

My boss has commented to me about the change in my life.

I am more conscious about how I treat the people around me; I see it as my ministry.

Thanks, Pastor."

That's why I am doing this. "Forgive me, Lord, when I complain."

life-giving water

Flowers growing out of a water pond seem almost misplaced. How did they get there? Where are there roots? How do they sustain life without apparent soil to connect with?






Well, they are in water...duh...

If you pulled them out of the water they would die pretty quickly.

But they are "resting" in life-giving water!

Plant me by the water, Lord, or in the water if you choose. Help me to be "like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers." Psalm 1:3

body life

Ray Stedman wrote a book in the seventies called BODY LIFE. It greatly impacted my ministry as a young pastor in a small but growing inner-city church. We often in a chuch service prayed for one another, passed an offering plate to minister to someone's financial need, volunteered to care for someone in distress by connecting the needy with someone who had available resources. Those services are still poignantly stamped on my memory.

Last night we imported that idea into a communion and prayer service on our church property building site, underneath an outdoor covering in an area where we generally have picnics and outdoor services.

We made a large circle--about 50-60 came--and then sang worship songs, shared personal testimonies, prayed for one another's needs as a body, and took communion. It was warm--probably 100 degrees--but those of us who determined to come were richly blessed.

The life of the body where we weep and rejoice with one another (I Corinthians 12:26), when we carry one another's burdens in fulfillment of Christ's law (Galatians 6:1ff) and where we affrim that our completeness and satisfaction are in Christ alone (Colossians 2:9,10) are the essence of what it means to be part of the family of God.

We will do it again.