family dysfunction

I saw a holiday movie yesterday that mirrored a family's dysfunction. Elongaged sibling rivalry, marital infidelity, parental favortism, racial slurring, gang violence, intercity economics, broken relationships, war's scarring--all of these themes, and more, were molded into a ghraphic of a family out of sync. In the end, the underlying commitment of family members to one another, and a father's love for all of his family, resonate loudly in extolling the virtues of family love triumphing over family dysfunction.

I suppose all of our families have their own nuances of what others might perceive to be veiled neuroticism. There are family favorites ("She's the one who got the most attention!"), family secrets ("My parents always yelled at each other...and later made up...it was disgusting!"), family phrases ("If I have told you once, I have told you a thousand times...", family traits ("We like our fried food salted") and even family fashions ("All the men like to go without socks"), etc.

The holidays tend to bring us all together, and if these special occasions are left unguarded, tend to expose all of our family dysfunctions in living color. So what can we do about that before Uncle Ted and his six "wild" children arirve for Christmas Eve dinner?

1. Be purposely thankful for family; though imperfect, they are the only family we have.


2. Be passively forgetful about past unresolved family issues; allow kindness and forgiveness to rule the day.

3. Be positively hopeful that the holidays will provide new opportunities for trulyenjoying your...dysfunctional family.

After all, you are part of that family.